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Use Your Near Vision as a Tool to Connect with People

An engaging way to apply mindfulness for everyone above 40

“Help”, by The Vivi

If you are 40+ and you have some of the following symptoms:

  1. You hold books or your phone away from your face to see them
  2. Need more light for close work
  3. Experience eyestrain after long reading sessions
  4. Have dry eyes more and more often
  5. Don’t feel comfortable driving in the dark

You may be nearsighted (you have presbyopia.)

Your everyday existence, as you know it, is going to transform. You now depend on your glasses to read and perform activities at a close distance. If you haven’t experienced dependence so far, welcome to the rest of your life. In the beginning, to avoid some trouble, try to:

  1. Buy neck strings (the chains can be fancy and compliment your personality.) Hard to lose or misplace glasses when you hold them around your neck.
  2. Order two pairs; you will lose or scratch one.
  3. Try a lower prescription than you need. It can prevent refractive errors from progressing.
  4. Carry your glasses in a case.

Reframe

Now, let’s make the best of this negative experience. It is easy to pull out your glasses or put them on if you are already wearing them around your neck. You are independent, you can manage, right?

But, could you use your weak eyesight excuse to enhance your relationships and communicate with people? Here is how.

Examples:

1.      When you are having a meal at a restaurant, ask your partner to read the menu for you. It will make them happy to help you, and it will empower them. In case you both wear glasses, just ask the waiter for recommendations and go with the flow.

2.      Ask people to read labels for you. In a shop, in a pharmacy, heck at the DIY store. Your helpers will just love this. They will drop whatever they are doing to help you.

3.      Ask kids to read a book for you. In a technology-driven era, you will help children develop the curiosity to read books. Teachers should do that every single day.

4.      Give your phone to people in the street and ask them to search for addresses or read stuff for you. This kind of trust elicits the best from people! Watch how they tune into your needs, how they respond lovingly, simply because you trusted them with your phone.

“Cooking and shooting with glasses”, by The Vivi

Take initiative

You crave authentic connections in your life. Breaking people’s habits (such as staring at their phone screens) and showing your vulnerability while trusting everyone to use your phone builds communication and puts a smile on two faces. Think how surprised you would be if someone asked you to hold their bag when they button their coat. In an elevator, in the street, anywhere. Especially, someone you don’t know!

Try it. Start focusing your attention on random people. It costs nothing to ask a guy to help you, but the reward is significant. Both of you will feel an instant connection. Warmth in your hearts will connect you and you will feel trust and love. We all want to be noticed. And when a random person asks us for help, we open up like tulips at 12 pm.

Break the bell jar

Humans have been separated and communicate with increasing difficulty thanks to technology and social norms that are absurd and irrelevant. How many times have you heard: “Don’t talk to strangers!” Really? The doctor who treats your son’s cold was first a stranger when you met. The courier, the delivery guy, the plumber, they are all strangers, and you let them into your house! Don’t accept living in fear. Think twice before you choose to live under a bell jar. You will break it when you need someone’s help, so why not do it sooner than later? Do it because you want to! Because you feel the excitement to interact with fellow humans, learn from them, admire them, and honor their being.

Your gift

You can use this simple tool to become more kind and mindful, too. Dive into the other person’s eyes when you establish the connection. Look into their eyes and practice humility and love. Smile. Tell yourself how lucky you are to get help. Tell them how lucky they are to have good eyesight.

Humans thrive on attention and love. And as crazy as it sounds, talking to strangers and all, your attention is an amazing gift you can offer every day.


As nature talks only about love in February, here is a love letter you should have gotten a long time ago: 

Published inLife after 40LoveMindfulnessRelationshipsSelf-realization

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